Atlantis
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30 September

Atlantis,

I had a dream last night. Before I can tell you about it, I have to tell you something. Once I had a very dear internet friend. On a sad day we couldn’t be friends anymore. It hurt the both of us a lot. It took time not to think about him anymore, and I think I managed pretty well. There’s always some kind of energy in me that makes that everything is worth living again. So I went on living, thinking everything was ok again, thinking life was beautiful again. And then at once there was this dream. You know, we played guitar together on internet, and he dedicated songs to me. He wrote letters to me that where só sensible, só sweet that I thought I could drown in them. I was happy. You know, my life wasn’t easy at that moment, but still there was a constant undertone in me that made me feel light, bright, shining.

I heard a song we used to play, far away, from a long distance. It woke me up. The sound was kind of thin, but came nearer and nearer, until it was so close to me that I could feel the sound, could touch it. I embraced the sound, the song.  I became one with the sound. Can you imagine to be one with a song, with the vibration of music. I opened my eyes and held my guitar. For the first time since we broke up I could play again, without being sad.

Now I wish this dream had been real. I still can’t manage to take my guitar and play. And I miss the music so much, SO MUCH, you can’t imagine. But I feel that when I start to play again I open such a big box of emotions, that I will drown for real, and I will not be able to swim anymore.

Thira

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